Tersteeg, Maria

With great sadness we announce the passing of Riet (Maria) Josephine Ludwina Tersteeg (ne van Leeuwen) , beloved wife of Arie Tersteeg.

Riet passed away peacefully at the Sunny South Lodge in Coaldale surrounded by family on December 4, 2021 at the age of 88 years.

Besides her husband, she will be deeply missed by her children and their families:

John (Angeline) Tersteeg; Justin (Jesse) and children Jaxon, Theo and Wyatt; Braedon Tersteeg; Jordan Tersteeg

Lorena (Jay) Forster; Joel Forster; Lauren Forster

Angela (George) Lohues; Connor (Krysten) Lohues and their children Aro and Oskar; Natasha Lohues;  Miranda Lohues

Jeannette (Bryce) Bennett; Hillary (Bradon) Valgardson; Rhys (Presley) Bennett; Wyatt Bennett; Isabelle (Christian) Bagshaw

Pauliene Luck (Steve Craig); Tarren Luck; Tiana Luck (Briar Peters); Quinton Luck

Patricia (Mark) Lohues; Jessica (Cody) Nelson; Christopher Lohues; Zachary Lohues

Michael (Debbie) Tersteeg; Scott Tersteeg (Hannah Wing); Sean Tersteeg

Riet is predeceased by daughter Wilma Tersteeg;  granddaughter Anna Maria Lohues;  parents, Nicolaas and Wilhelmina Van Leeuwen;  two sisters, five brothers and numerous brothers and sisters in law.

Maria was born Maria Josephina Ludwina Van Leeuwen on March 18, 1933 in Den Hoorn, South Holland. She was the tenth of thirteen children. She was known as Marietja when she was a young girl but as she grew older, her nickname was shortened to Riet.

When Riet was born, her family was living on a farm in Abswoude near Delft. As the depression gripped the Netherlands, and when Riet was about two years old, the farm went into receivership and the family moved to a rental house in Den Hoorn. Riet attended school through grade 8 after which she went to seamstress school. During this time she also worked as a housekeeper. As a teenager she loved to go dancing on weekends. She maintained her dancing skills throughout her life and loved dancing at weddings and New Years Eve parties.

Arie was in Ontario working with Riet's brother Nic. Nic was preparing to write letters to his sisters Truus and Riet who shared the same birthday and were ten years apart. He felt too busy to write two letters and after Arie agreed to write one of them, Nic asked Arie, "Do you want to write to the younger sister or the older sister?"  Arie chose to write to the younger sister, who was Riet and this started their pen pal relationship on March 20, 1955. Arie and Riet spent nearly 5 years getting to know one another: this included almost 3 years writing letters as friends, about a month together in the Netherlands, a year and half sending romantic letters and six months dating in Canada after she immigrated in May 1959. She worked as a cleaner at St Mikes Catholic Hospital until they married on November 28, 1959.

In Mid-1960, Arie and Riet learned they were expecting their first child. They were thrilled for their little family to start growing. Wilma was born on February 11, 1961, however the Tersteegs would not be bringing their new baby home with them. Wilma died at birth. Riet will be laid to rest in the same plot with Wilma.  A year later, on April 17, 1962 a baby boy was born to them and their family quickly grew to include 7 children that eventually expanded again as the children all found partners.  Arie and Riet were thrilled to become grandparents and the Tersteeg numbers increased to include twenty grandchildren and five great-grandchildren.   She took pride in taking care of her family and relished in all the accomplishments of her children and grandchildren. She would sacrifice her needs for the good of her family.

Riet was a consistent presence in the lives of her family. She listened to her kids describing their days at school. She offered empathetic words of wisdom to her kids during stressful and challenging times in their lives.  She relished being a mother. Her children can attest to the fact that she rarely lost her temper with them or even raised her voice. Always supportive and encouraging, always wise and kind, she was proud of all her children and grandchildren.

She had a cheeky sense of humor and would surprise us occasionally with antics like putting a pie in someone's face or joking about what she was serving for supper. She had a quick smile for everyone and even in her years with dementia she never lost her gentle manner and care for others. 

While living on the farm, Riet's vast sewing knowledge was beneficial as she sewed clothes for herself and her family.  Along with her sewing she could crochet, knit and embroider. Fall was always a busy time with preserving the many vegetables from their huge garden and bottling fruits from BC trips.   Even though the days on the farm were busy, they made time for card games with their friends.  Riet and Arie, as they worked side by side, exemplified a strong work ethic.  They expected their children to help out with chores on the farm, the large garden and in the house. This upbringing helped each of the children get a post-secondary education and find success in their chosen field.

In 1994, Arie and Riet retired from the farm and moved into Picture Butte.  They now had more time for visiting family, card games with friends and good laughs over coffee.  They took great pride in their yard in town. The yard was visually striking and had a lovely fragrance from all the flowers that could be found in every corner of it. It was a thrill when the horticultural society of Lethbridge came to the garden to view it.  With the desire to stay active, they  took to walking around town. Many Picture Butte residents will remember seeing the cute older couple walking hand in hand on a daily basis and in perfect step. Retirement also provided more time to travel and they were able to enjoy some vacations. Trips to the Netherlands to see family were especially treasured.

As Arie and Riet aged, and along with Arie's blindness and Riet's dementia, it became more difficult to maintain their home in Picture Butte and they moved to the Sunny South Lodge in Coaldale in 2015. Living in Coaldale, they were now closer to their kids, allowing them to visit more often. They continued to walk together, attend exercise class together and joined in the activities the lodge provided.  There was always a puzzle going on the puzzle board, a Sudoku book beside her chair and chocolates in the fridge. Riet settled into a comfortable routine as many of the daily tasks were no longer her responsibility, allowing for more enjoyable hobbies and activities provided in the lodge.

Riet was calm and serene in her Catholic faith. From her childhood forward she had a special place in her heart for Mother Mary. In challenging times, she turned to her faith for support to guide and calm her. She served as a member in the Canadian Women's League (CWL) and over the years, she cooked many a turkey for the fall supper fundraiser. Together, Arie and Riet prayed the rosary every evening, allowing for many tender feelings to be shared.  As her dementia progressed and she found it hard to find words, she could still pray the rosary with Arie.  She held fast to her faith in God's plan until God called her home on December 4, 2021.

The never ending easter egg hunts in the yard, where you could find chocolates long after the Easter holiday. The dutch food favorites such as chocolate sprinkle sandwiches, turkey croquettes and oliebollen. Playing with the trucks in the flower garden.  Games of Othello, Chess, Checkers and Mastermind.  The doll cribs Opa made and Oma sewed matching blankets for. The Rainbow Bright book where the grandkids felt so special because Oma would change the character name to the grandchild's name. Building puzzles and helping with the word search from the newspaper. Oma's amazingly strong legs that could give "horsey rides' ' for the grandkids for hours it seemed. And the famous meatball soup that we have all tried to replicate but did not get exactly right probably because it was seasoned with a bit of Omas love. These are the treasured memories that the grandchildren have shared.

Riet will be remembered as a selfless, altruistic wife and mother who always had a smile, even when times were tough. She had a quiet strength. She rarely complained and always looked to a better future.

All these wonderful qualities of Riet live on as an example for her children, grandchildren and so many others whose lives have been touched by her. 

Riet had a special talent for writing poems and blessed each of the children with a poem on their wedding day. We often found a rhyming verse in birthday cards and Christmas cards. Some of us inherited this talent and this poem, if given the chance, is how we imagine our Mom would have written it for us today as her last poem:

As you look around you, reflect and take heed

As you look around you, reflect and take heed

All the things in life each of you did to succeed.

I want you to know how proud I can be

Because you now have an angel in me.

You made my life beautiful and so full of love

My heart is now full, and I fly like a dove

I feel I have won, it was a team victory

And now you have an angel in me.

My expectations of life never fell short

I lived, I loved and had so much support

As you face each day please know and believe

That now you have an angel in me.

Take risks, have fun and reach for your dreams

Don't worry about falling or scraping your knees

My hand though invisible will guide you, you'll see.

Because now you have an angel in me.

There is so much in life to learn and discover

Find magic, make waves and inspire one another

I'll guard you; I'll protect you and I'll never flee

Because now you have an angel in me

Make each day an adventure to learn something new

I'm watching, I'm here, I'm always with you

My wings are spread wide and I'm here to oversee

Always know you have an angel in me.

Go forth in your life and live without fear

I will sprinkle in things to remind you I'm here

I hope they bring you smiles, courage and glee

Because now you have an angel in me.

A private Prayer Service will be held on Tuesday, December 7, 2021 at 7:00 P.M. and a private Funeral Mass celebrated on Wednesday, December 8, 2021 at 1:00 P.M. with Father Ian Gagne celebrating.  Both the Prayer Service and Funeral Mass will be live streamed and recorded, and may be accessed via Maria's obituary on the Cornerstone website.

Interment will follow at Mountain View Cemetery in Lethbridge.

In lieu of flowers, and in memory of Maria, donations may be made to your local food bank.